Home > Poetry > To Ask Forgiveness

To Ask Forgiveness

You see nothing
but foxes and dreams, a daffodil
hidden from time, still
bright yellow, always perfect
in its secrets –
I gather them easily enough,
a bouquet of old mistakes
forever new.

This is where
the lies leave off, a thorn
stripped of all its sincerity; a single
red rose that wilts quicker
than it can bloom, reminding me
of all the funerals I’ve seen before,
even those that are not marked
by a gravestone.

Leave it behind.
Forget even the fingers
of every little miracle; it taints,
but it is also tainted, a siege
of silences that conjure
nothing but ghosts, old words
laid out, laid bare, unable to be buried
or lopped off from their origins.
Leave it behind? If only it were that simple.

There were lilacs that day,
an incandescent reminder
of memories made against the cold,
a shelter for the leaner years,
a light for the darker years,
a star that falls for the sake of the journey –
oh, that was me, wasn’t it?
And I burnt out quickly,
hushed like a bullet
flung from a silent gun:
end it, he said.
But I couldn’t. I couldn’t even try.

Your laugh was love-knot,
and it stuck in my smile; I did not want
to untangle it. It was a choice,
and without warning, you dared a laugh
I could hear but couldn’t catch,
it fell against me like an appetite, ravenous
and indelible, all limbs and demands –
there, between us, naked
and rend of bones, our secrets
blossomed out, a gathering of looks
that nailed us down, dragging
our skin from our selves, a printing
of passion onto the shadows of our souls,
a love-trick, a creature without vows,
each kiss a promise of one
trying to occupy the other.

Now, we wear each other’s faces like masks,
as every other future ceased
in a single moment
whispered:
yes.

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Categories: Poetry
  1. November 22, 2011 at 8:40 am

    Beautifully visceral!

  2. November 22, 2011 at 9:09 am

    Thank you so much, Ana!! 🙂

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