Home > advice -- not that you asked, Poetry, prose, Random Musings, Writing > Thirteen Ways to Forget Him or Her
Thirteen Ways to Forget Him or Her
- Find the river Lethe. Drink an entire cup. Don’t vomit it back up, even if it tastes of poison.
- Drink gin. If there is no gin, drink vodka. If there is no vodka, open the tequila. Do not drink the worm.
- Smile at everyone. They will forget your pain. Eventually, that will convince you it’s gone.
- Never say ‘I miss you.’ Don’t write it down, either.
- Remove all contacts from your cell phone.
- Burn all photographs. Yes, even the one you hid under the mattress.
- Pretend to be someone else. Use an accent. Make up a backstory. Lose yourself in that other life.
- Don’t look in the mirror. Failing that, don’t ask the mirror questions. Don’t ask any questions at all, ever.
- Take up running. Try to outrun yourself.
- Laugh at everything, loudly. Sometimes, too loudly.
- Avoid every wolf that comes to your door. They are not meant to be friendly, no matter what is promised.
- When all else fails (and it will), there is only one thing left to do: forgive.